Sunday, August 29, 2010

Madden 11

In my online franchise, Aaron Rodgers is the only offensive player with a forced fumble. You're about to see why.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure (Retro)


Heard of this game? Of course you didn't. How could you?  It was one of those games that only hardcore fight and/or anime fans knew about, unless you were one of the few who went out on a limb and actually bought it just to see what it would be like. Now I say anime, but this game is actually based on the manga, which has some key differences. I guess that really doesn't matter since none of that came overseas. The game was released in America in 1999 for Playstation and Dreamcast. The anime didn't show up until 2003 and the manga 2005. So what was the purpose of bringing it over here? Well, the only reason I can think of is that back then Capcom was shooting fighting games out the ass every 5 minutes. It got so crazy, Capcom even created a points club for gamers called the Capcom Edge. Every time you bought a Capcom game, you earned points that could be used for gear like t-shirts and duffel bags and shit like that. So Capcom may have figured that people would buy it simply because of the points and the fact it was a fighting game. Now I don't know if that's true, but it's the only semi-logical reason I can think of. I've only just finished watching the anime and the third arch of the manga, so I decided to pick this up just for shits and giggles. As soon as I popped it in, one thing became quickly apparent....this game is old.

In the Dreamcast version, this is a port of 2 Japanese arcade games: JoJo's Venture and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, with both games in the disc. JoJo's Venture is the orginal game, and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is the updated version, kinda like Street Fighter 4 and Super Street Fighter 4. Now why on Earth would you need to put the same game twice on one disc? I'm obviously just gonna play Bizarre Adventure since it has more shit. The arcade game was made in 1997, and it shows in the DC version. The made no effect to up the visuals in this game, and the audio sounds so dated. Even the N64 is capable of better sound. That's acceptable for the PS1 version, but not the Dreamcast. There are only 2 modes: story mode and challenge mode which is basically a survival mode. There's also two player, but that's a gimmie for fighting games. The story is just absolute shit. I don't mean the story in general; that's awesome. I mean the way the game handles it. This game doesn't explain shit to you. So many important pieces are missing and plot twist happen for no reason. If you didn't read the manga or watch the anime, which NOBODY FUCKING COULD DO in 1999, you were at a loss most of the time. Why in the ass would you not change it so that the story would be understandable knowing full well nobody has seen any JoJo related media? With shitty sound, aged visual, incomprehensible story, and lacking in feature, it's no wonder why nobody owned this game. Despite that, all is forgiven when you actually play it and realize a very important fact...

It's a 2D fighter....made by Capcom....

You should definitely check out the anime and the manga if you get a chance. As for the game, the fighting is good...well...actually it's fuckin awesome, but everything else doesn't make it worth it unless you find it cheap. If you actually own a copy, do NOT get rid of it. That game might be worth some money.

Mortal Kombat 2 (Retro)


A long time ago, my mom gave me a choice between a Super Nintendo and a Sega Genesis, and I picked the Genesis. After playing MK2 at my cousin's house for SNES, I had to get it for the Genesis. While it was still the hotness, you don't know how important buttons are until you realize you're missing a few. Having less buttons than any other version of the game (not counting handheld systems), the Genesis turned a already hard game into a bitch.

With only 3 buttons, you don't get many moves, especially when you can't figure out how to low punch. Most of my matches broke down into me just using the roundhouse kick or uppercut (TOASTY!). One of my biggest problems was the absence of a block button. I tried holding back like in Street Fighter, but that didn't work. So I got my ass handed to me over and over again. Once I figured out how to actually beat people, I realized I didn't know any fatalities, so I press pause and went to call my cousin to see if he can find some for me. There was no internet back then (damn I feel old) so he had to check his game magazines for them. After I wrote them down, I went back to my game to find out my guy died a long time ago and I'm back at the main menu. After a hissy fit that involved breaking several items, I started over again to see what went wrong, and that's when it hit me.

The start button is block!? THE START BUTTON IS BLOCK!!??

So how to I pause the game? The game laugh at me and said "Pause? Bitch, this is Mortal Kombat; you don't get no pause. Fight to the end pussy." Well the good news was I finally had a block button so fighting was easier. The bad news was I had to use the bathroom. That's the thing about the old MK games. It was one of those game series where you needed friends to play single player. Whenever somebody loss, he passed it to the next person in a vain attempt to get farther up the ladder only to get beat by someone with 4 arms. Good times.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Top Ten Racing Games

Who doesn't want to climb into a ten ton supercharged machine and tear ass on 4 four and sometimes 2 wheels? Nobody, and that's why racing games are awesome! This list celebrates the best of the best.


10. Ridge Racer - PSX
When my friend bought her Playstation, it came with a demo of Ridge Racer. It was one car, one track, and we played for hours. One car! One track! So you can imagine the amount of time we lost we she got the full version. Why were we so addicted? Never had we played a racing game before where the cars drift...THEY DRIFT!



9. DiRT - PS3, PC, and 360
This game did something I never thought was possible: it made me care a rally car racing. It had great tracks, super tight and responsive controls, and an incredible sense of speed. This is one of the few games where doing a time trial was actually fun.



8. San Fransisco Rush - Arcades
As much as I like Rush 2 and Rush 2049, the original holds a special place in my heart. There have been many 3D racers, but this was the first one where you could crash and burn.....as in your car would explode! Burning rubber takes the literal meaning in this bitch. Add crazy shortcuts and you got yourself one kickass arcade racer.



7. Midnight Club 3 Dub Edition Remix - PS2 and Xbox
Remember when The Fast and the Furious came out and street racing became the most popular thing ever? This game represented all that was FUN about it. Midnight Night has always been know for it open world style and create your own route gameplay, but number 3 added real license car that were fully customizable. The Greatest/Platinum hits version called Remix makes the list for adding new cars and the city of Tokyo for MC2.



6. F-Zero -SNES
Besides the colorful graphics, blazing speeds, a cool soundtrack, and great original gameplay, F-Zero can be some up in one simple statement...........this bitch is hard.


5. Burnout Revenge - Xbox 360
Burnout Paradise is fun, but I'm not really feeling the open world Midnight Club style gameplay. Burnout is best played on tracks with laps and lots of shit in your way that can cause a catastrophic amount of damage. Actually, Burnout Paradise can do that too. So what makes Revenge special? Crash mode!


4. Gran Turismo 4 - PS2
Yes fanboys, it's only number 4. Suck it. With that said Gran Turismo is the reason we have racing sims at all, and the 4th installment is the best of them all with what was at the time the most realistic car controls ever and graphics that looked better than anything on the PS2. Seriously, put GT4 in HD (like they did God of War) and you will see it holds up to many PS3 games.


3. Mario Kart 64 - N64
One of the only 2 racing games on the list that doesn't actually use cars, Mario Kart is addictive as all hell. Yes, the racing was faster on Double Dash and Wii, but what puts 64 on the list is its battle mode. No Mario Kart has had a battle mode as fun as the 64 game. Why I don't know, and it's a damn shame.


2. Forza Motorsport 3 - 360
Making the GT fans even angrier, its Forza at number 3. This game has the best career mode of any racing sim out there and has a level of customizable paint job never seen before. The most important aspect is that it's extreme assessable to newbies with all its assists. Take the assists off, and we're looking at Forza 2 difficulty, sliding all over the place...pisses me off....


Gran Turismo, Forza, and Mario Kart not making number 1? Really? Not even Burnout or Midnight Club? What in God's name can be number 1 then? Some of you may already have an idea where I'm going with this since I left out probably the most popular racing series in video games, but the game I have at number one will have everyone wondering what the hell is wrong with me. At the same time, it'll have everyone who played it smiling as they all have fond memories of it.


1. Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit 2 - PS2
This...game...is...the awesome! Your goal was finishing the race in first place while the police were trying to bust your ass, and the police were actually good at their job. We're talking rockblocks, spike strips, and fuckin helicopters dropping exploding barrels from the sky. This game was absolutely fuckin nuts. It's not like other Need For Speed games that feature cops. It's not an open world. You don't have to lose the cops once the race is over. Hell, sometimes the race isn't even over when the cops manage to pull you over. They give you a ticket and send you on your way. This formula is much better than any of the new shit they did (cough cough Most Wanted cough) and even though it's open world, let's hope the new Hot Pursuit can replicate what made number 2 fun. Also keep in mind I'm talking about the PS2 version, not the Xbox and Gamecube version which plays differently for some reason.

Deadliest Warrior (XBLA)

Here's my first problem with the game: I can't find any decent artwork for it. I tried a lot of them, and they either didn't load right or were too small and came out blurry as hell when I blew them up, so yea, you get no box art with this one. Now, when you look at Deadliest Warrior, your first instinct tells you that this is a quick cash grab, and no one would blame for thinking that, but you play the game, you realized that it's not as bad as you thought......but it's damn sure not as good as it should be.

The basic premise of the game is one on one realistic combat, emphasis on the word REALISTIC. You can't take too many hits. In fact only 4 hits unguarded will kill you. That's an interesting concept, isn't it? How many fighting games do you know where it doesn't take much to kill you? The only game that comes to mind is the Bushido Blade series on the PSX/PS1, and that was 12 years ago if I'm not mistaken. So, with damage levels this high, defense is THE most important aspect. If you can't protect yourself, you will die. That may be true with most fighting games, but in others you can sometimes get by on awesome offense and/or aggressiveness. You try that shit here and you'll lose an arm. Yea, this game doesn't fuck around. Sometimes, all it takes is one hit. I've won and loss so many fights with only one blow. 

There are only 8 fighters in this game, and I know many people have a problem with this. Normally I wouldn't, but this time I do because I know for a fact (not really) that they're holding back for downloadable content. Even if they weren't, they have a large catalog to draw from because of the show. It's not like Blazblue where it's an all new experience and therefore a small roster is okay. We know they have more people because we've seen the show. Besides, this is suppose to pit some of history's greatest fighter in a 'what if' scenario. I'm pretty sure history produced more than 8! Sigh* I wanted to see a musketeer fight a samurai. Well, it's a small complaint really as 8 is good enough.

[Update]: There's a poll on their website asking fans what fighters they want to see as downloadables. I'm curious as to how much it will cost per fighter.



Combat is as basic as fighting games are allowed to be, but now in a bad way. Each fighter uses low, medium, and high attacks as well as projectiles, short range, and medium range weapons. You can parry attacks by holding block and guessing which attack he'll use. That's pretty much it. No wait. There's also a stamina meter, and when it's low your attacks will slow down your your guard will break. This helps prevent people from either hacking too much or blocking all damn day. No, it doesn't have many combos, but if you can kill in 4 hits, you really don't need that many. During fights, if you do it right, you can injure body parts and even amputate them. Some can still fights with a missing arm, but they'll slowly bleed out. My main problem with the combat is that it feels too loose. Warriors attack too fast, and attacks don't have any weight behind them. This leads to very unsatisfying endings to fights, unless the final blow cuts off a limb (or head). Another thing that bugs me is the load times. With only 8 characters, small combo list, few stages, and the fact that it's downloaded onto the hard drive, why in the holy hell does it take so long to load and why does it happen so often? You will spend more time watching the screen load than you will fighting, and that's not an exaggeration. To be fair, the loading is really long (15 seconds tops), but it happens so often if feels that way. Every time I tried to play online, the game would be choppy as hell, sometimes even disconnecting, and I know it's not my connection, so I don't know what's wrong. Maybe it's an isolated incident, but it's still worth mentioning.

I really can't recommend this game as a purchase, but it's interesting to try. If the combat was fine tuned, attacks had actually weight to them, and loading was cut down some, I'd say this would be a XBLA hit, but as it stands, it's just one of those games that just...exist. It neither good nor bad; it's just there.

Rating: Meh

NOTE: Bushido Blade....talk about obscured video game reference.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Top Ten Fighting Game Series

I'm not gonna lie; I suck at most fighters, but that doesn't stop me from playing them. Nothing like beating the holy hell out of each other until one can no longer fight. For this top ten, there are a couple of rules. This is a list of fighting game SERIES, so there has to be more than 2. Sorry Blazblue, but you're one game too short. Also, it cannot belong to the sports genre, so games like Fight Night and UFC are out. No wrestling games either.


10. Guilty Gear
Although we can't put Blazblue into this list, we can damn sure put his daddy on it. Guilty Gear has awesome visuals, interesting characters, kickass rock music, and some of the smoothest controls ever in a 2D fighter. And let's not forget the instant kills. It's so awesome, it makes people forget that Sol Badguy is...just...a terrible fuckin name.



9. King of the Fighters
I don't know which came first, this or Street Fighter 2, but dammit if is didn't help revolutionize 2D fighters. If you were a Art of Fighting and Fatal Fury, you practically shitted your pants as this game pitted fighters from both games against each other. SNK knows how to make a damn good fighter. If only they didn't go bankrupt.



8. Darkstalkers
I did not know what a succubus was until I played this game.....thanks I guess. Anyway, it seems that the people from Capcom decided "Hey! Let's take what we learned from Street Fighter, have a shitload of monsters, and give it a cool name to stand out. It will be awesome!" Well, that's what they did....and it was awesome. You have vampires and succubi and a werewolf and a guy walking around with a little....girl?......I'm assuming someone gonna call the police on him.




7. Dead or Alive
When I think of DOA, two things come to mind: kickass fighting and jiggly ninja boobs. It's like watching a 3D anime.....of awesome. DOA is one of the few games that have a reversal system, and it's useful as it is complicated. Not bad for a fighting game that's two polygons away from full-frontal nudity.



6. Virtua Fighter
THE...FIRST! Virtua Fighter is the reason DOA exist in the first place. It was a little rough at first since everyone moved so slow and floated in the air like they were on the fuckin moon, but the series has long since advanced into one of the most technical fighters...EVER! It's all about timing and placement. If you don't having timing, you lose. If you don't have placement, you lose. If you button mash, you're a fuckin joke. Put the control down bitch; you suck!




5. Tekken
Talk to any hardcore fight fan, and there will most likely be an argument as to which is better: Tekken or Virtua Fighter. It's a difficult choice, but I'm gonna have to say Tekken simply because they have more people. Normally it's quality over quantity, but in Tekken's case, they have quality AND quantity. While there are some issues, you wouldn't expect a 3D fighter with so many fighters to be this balance, but they pulled it off in Tekken 5 and 6.



4. Soulcalibur
Hot damn, Namco can some good 3D fighters. Besides the fact that this is one of the few fighting games based solely on weapons, Soul Calibur 3 was the first fighting game to have a create-a-fighter mode if I'm not mistaken. What also makes this series special is the special guests Soul Calibur 2 and Soulcalibur: Broken Destiny has. You got to play as Zelda's Link and God of War's Kratos for crying out loud. And no that's not a typo. After Soul Calibur 3, the name changed to Soulcalibur. Why? I don't know.



3. Super Smash Bros.
Besides being the most original fighter on the list, SSB pits pretty much all of Nintendo against each other in a battle royal. To beat your opponents, you can't just simply KO them oh no. You have to knock them CLEAR ACROSS THE FUCKIN STAGE! It's so awesome, Solid Snake and Sonic wanted in. At first, I didn't think this game was as good as everyone says, but I was playing alone. Soon as I got some friends over, hot damn. We played this together more than any other game on the list so far.



Now, we all know what the top two games are gonna be; it's a no fuckin brainer. The question is how do we choose which is number 2 and which is number 1. After much thought, a few beers, a nap, and several games of Call of Duty, we finally made our decision.

2. Mortal Kombat
Most of the games on this list had an impact on the fighting genre. MK had an impact on the entire fuckin gaming industry. Yea, it's that badass. The introduction of the fatalities is the reason video games have a rating system. That's right; MK created the ESRB. That's fuckin nuts. Just watch the video. Stuttering Craig never lie. Games like Gears of War owe their existence to this series. Now, when MK made the jump to 3D, people have mixed feelings about it. Some say it was good while others say it was mediocre at best. Either way, MK holds a special place in our hearts, and our hearts hold a special place in Kano's hands.


1. Street Fighter/Capcom vs.
What puts Street fighter on the top of this list is consistency. This series stayed great after 2 decades because Capcom knows what they're doing. Only Street Fighter can change so little and yet remain so awesome. While Street Fighter deserves all the credit it gets, it was really the Capcom vs. series that kept 2D fighters around for as long as they have been. First, Capcom created the X-Men fighting game, then X-Men vs Street Fighter, then Marvel Super Heroes vs Street Fighter, then finally Marvel vs Capcom 1 and 2. Capcom then proceeded to partner up with SNK to create probably the most tech of the vs. games with the Capcom vs SNK series. These games pretty much played into the geeky fanboy and fansgirls in all of us. With Marvel vs Capcom 3 on it's way and the recently announced Street Fighter x Tekken (I'm dead fuckin serious), Capcom aint letting go of that top spot anytime soon.



Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Skate Reel #2

Okay, so it turns out I can't put Skate 2 stuff up, but that's cool. Skate 3 has pretty of spots for footage. Here's me at Carverton Memorial Park.

Turok: Dinosaur Hunter (RETRO)


When you think of shooters for the N64, what do you think of? Goldeneye? Yes, yes of course. Perfect Dark? Absolutely. How about Turok? Fuck Yea! I mean sure, Goldeneye is iconic and is probably responsible for shooters being on consoles, and Perfect Dark was so awesome your N64 needed an expansion pack to play it, but you play as agents and only shoot measly little humans (and maybe a few aliens in PD). In Turok, you're a bow and arrow wielding Native American shooting poachers, aliens, and dinosaurs. Oh, I sorry. Did I say dinosaurs? What I meant to say was CYBORG DINOSAURS.......WITH GUNS!!! Fuck Yea! Not good enough? How about alien guns that eviscerate your enemies, including mini-nukes? Still not convinced? How about a boss fight with a robot T-Rex? Yea, I thought so. You know the only thing better than Turok? Umm...okay yea..Goldeneye and Perfect Dark...b-but that's not where I'm going with this. Turok 2! More of everything, and probably the most kick-ass gun ever: the cerebral bore. This gun shoots machines that drills into the cranium of your enemies and squeezes the brains out. After Turok 2, the series went downhill, but we will always the first 2 games and all of it cyborg dinosaur awesomeness.



Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Skate Reel #1

Somebody asked me one day why I never any of my gameplay on the blog. It's always someone else work I'm posting. Well, I don't own nor can I afford the equipment necessary to record my own work. There is, however, one game that can do it for me. So, instead of the review (which I should have done a long time ago), I'll post some videos I've recorded from Skate 2 and 3. This video is me in Rippon Towers in Skate 3. It took me 3 hours to pull this off as I could never gain enough speed.


I know, it's blurry. I think I need to download the HD pack to make it clearer.

Street Fighter 3: 3rd Strike (RETRO)


Everybody knows Street Fighter, but bring up the words "third strike' and it will over ring a bell to a select few. 3rd Strike is the third and final game in the Street Fighter 3 series, and is hailed by many fight fans as the greatest SF game ever made. Yes, even better than SF4 or Super SF4. I myself disagree because I believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that the greatest SF game ever is......Mortal Kombat Trilogy. Stupidly wrong game series aside, I would like to thank 3rd Strike for making me look for another Dreamcast controller after breaking mine old one out of frustration. In other words, this bitch is hard. Even on the lowest difficulty setting, I got my ass handed to me repeatedly. This game demands that only the best play. Now, I'm not great (or...good), but I'm no newbie either, so with a game kicking my ass on the easiest level, needless to say my ego took a hit. But you know what, maybe if they didn't replace almost the entire roster, I would have stood a better chance. Only Ken, Ryu, Chun-li, and Akuma made the cut. The rest were all new fighters. Besides being on 2 consoles that nobody cared about (Xbox didn't really gain popularity till 2003), the fact that nobody knew who the fighters were prevented 3rd Strike from selling among the casual fight fan. When it came out, I don't remember anybody really talking about it. It just didn't seem like Street Fighter anymore. Real fans weren't swayed though. They knew they had a badass game in their hands and they spent hours practicing with new people because they enjoyed the challenge of learning how to play all over again. Today, Street Fighter 4 brought 2D fighters back from the grave almost, and casual fight fans are loving every moment of it. Hardcore fans however, despite loving SF4, will always pop in 3rd Strike repeatedly kick each other asses or get their asses handed to them by Gill. Yea...Gill.....meh; it's better than Seth. Street Fighter 3: 3rd Strike: we salute you.


NOTE: Hell, I don't know if anything I said was true, but it sounded awesome right?